Take a time out before talking

Proverbs 10:19 (NLT)

19 Too much talk leads to sin. Be sensible and keep your mouth shut.

A warning to us all if we voice our thoughts in an unchecked manner those thoughts can turn to sin. Instead we should hold our thoughts to ourselves until the proper moment when through discernment and wisdom we have reasoned out the facts.

I showed up at the house of a friend and rang the doorbell. I was supposed to bring some chairs. He opened the door and said, "Ron, where are the chairs?"

I responded, "Oh, I forgot."

He glared at me and barked, "That figures!"

I thought, That figures? He thinks I'm no good. He thinks I can't follow through. He thinks I'm useless. Then I thought, Who does he think he is? The creep. I bet he's got a problem or 12!

But then I decided I had two options: believe the best about what he was saying—although that was pretty tough—and just forget about it, or ask him what he meant—even though it seemed obvious to me.

A couple of weeks later I saw him and brought it up: "You know the other day when I was at your house and forgot to bring the chairs and you said, 'That figures'? …"

He interrupted me and said, "I shouldn't have said that."

"I was wondering what you meant."

"Well, all day long that day in every meeting someone had forgotten something. It just figured."

So, he wasn't saying, "Jenson, you're a jerk." He was saying, "My day's been terrible."

[Adapted from Ron Jenson in Fathers and Sons, "Jerk Reaction," Men of Integrity (January/February 2005)]

It would have been so easy for Ron’s anger to get the best of him and speak out in ways that could have damaged a friendship. Instead Ron chose to wait, ponder his thoughts and ask for clarification to comments that were made. When he received his answer not only did he feel better, but he also avoided the trap of sin and kept a friendship whole.

Too often we want to speak out against something we just heard, but maybe we haven’t heard the full story yet. Our haste to speak may place us in a position where we later regret the words we have said. In this day and time of fast flowing information, take a moment, slow down and allow reason and wisdom to prevail you say something you will regret.